Can a woman be a mother, a wife and a careerwoman without sacrificing the basic structure of the family?
Name: Renee Email: none Response:
Can't you see that we have been doing it almost all of our lives. Since the times of slavery, women have worked outside of the home and after a long days work out in the field the woman chose to come back to the home and take responsiblity there. Even if you go as far back to the West African tribe, the woman work inside and outside of the home. Women have been doing it for a long time but, I believe the question at stake is whether or not we can do it without the help because usually we have the man there to assist us in all our doings. He helped to bring the income. So, even though the woman spent time outside of the home she wasn't the sole provider or parent. Not to discredit the women and I do speak with all (long past) due respect. You just have to understand that this is a point in time that some women have to learn to do without that other help. It will take some adapting but it can be done. Also, don't mistake me, I am not saying that all men are no good but there comes a point in time that a woman just has to do without, sometimes to have and keep one creates more of a headache. So, to all the women who are being that "superwoman" I say keep up the good work and even though you may not see the rewards right away or maybe you will never receive such honors, know that your labor is not in vain.
Name: Faith Email: Response:
The answer to the question is one that I have been struggling with for for some time. I am currently in medical school and fear not being able to "have it all." Somehow though, my mother did it, as did her mother. I believe the strength in a family comes from just that - the family. In order for a woman to be a successful wife, mother, and career person, she needs the support of her husband, extended family, and GOD. This is what worked for my family and I am sure it will work for me. The key is finding that partner who shares your goals of a strong family but will also help cultivate your interests outside of the home.
Name: Maria J. P.da Silva Email: No Email Address Response:
Yes and No!
Yes, if there is a consciousness that a career is a means to an end. Not the end itself. The end is our family! We develop ourselves and strive for successful careers to attain the things we think will provide better lives for ourselves and our offsprings. Work should, therefore, be regarded for what it is meant to be: sustenance and survival of the individual and the family.
No, if career and work become all too consuming. If it becomes the end rather than the means!
Name: G.P. Williams Email:gwillia1@ncsu.edu Response:
I suppose it depends on what you mean by being a "career woman" as opposed to just having a job. The demands that American companies place on their executives are not compatible with being a wife and mother. The ideal of having it all is a myth. If your boss thinks you are working more than 8 hours day and bringing work home your family life is suffering. I do believe that a woman can work outside the home and still be a good mother. But if you make that decision you have to realize that your career is going to be on the slow track until your children get older. Women shouldn't complain that it's not the same for men, you work to change things but in the meantime you have to put your children first. If that means making partner in five years when everyone else does it two so be it, your children are worth much more than any job promotion.
Name: Brenda Allen Email:brenda.allen@libertycornernj.attgis.com Response:
Just yesterday I spent 16 hours at the office and felt liberated. The kids were visiting their father and I 'got to stay late at the office'. My ex often put in 16 hour days and he's a partner now. I cannot because of the children. I hired someone to cook and put them to bed and they rebelled. I compromised and started coming home to be with them with great results in terms of their progress, but I will never make partner at this speed. I'm an engineer and am behind where I feel I should be. I sacrifice. My ex, has the freedom to put in the hours necessary to leapfrog ahead. I refuse to compromise my children's well-being at this stage of their lives (they're 7 and 8). I did so before and the results were not what I desired. These are hard choices. I make less, but the children thrive more.
Name: Jacquie Email:GLOVERJ@RSPA.DOT.GOV Response:
Absolutely yes. The basic structure of the family is not negatively impacted by a woman's career -- in fact, I am of the opinion that it strengthens the family structure. A woman that works outside of the home provides more dynamics to the husband/wife relationship, as well as empowers her children. Certainly anyone can neglect their family -- both male and female -- but if a woman sets and keeps her priorities straight, laughs a little and stays organized while providing love and discipline in the home; assertiveness in the workplace; she in fact can be SuperWoman. African American Women have long held the family together while working outside of the home; to imply that it can't be done without provoking some terrible pathological psychosis onto the family as a whole.
Name: janathel shaw Email:nmaa.janathel@.ic.si.edu Response:
Boy, that is a pretty loaded question and an age old question. As a single parent and a full-time employee, I would not have been able to raise my son without the help of family and community support. Something has to give and it's up to the mother/primary parent to decide. In my case my job has suffered because I've chosen to put my son and my education first. I hope that this answers the question.
Name: Donna Chambers Email:dchambers@hulaw1.harvard.edu Response:
A woman can be all three without affecting that basic structure of the family. It is not impossible to balance being a wife, mother, and career person. If one is committed to all three equally then it just becomes a question of balancing your time between all three. I think that the situtations where one of the theree suffers is where we place more value on one or the other. For example, if I beleived that my job is the most important thing in the world then chances are that when I am forced to make hard choices I will make a choice that will favor my job. However, if I think that my family and career are equally important then I will make hard choice that will ensure that none suffers at the expense of another. Life is all about choice, it has been that way since the begining of time, and will stall that way until the entire human race is extinct. As a woman preparing for a career, I can honestly say that I have ever intention to maintain a good balance between by career and the family that I am intent on having. That said, I must admit that I am young, and an optimist. If there are any experience career women out there who would like to chat about life in the work place please drop me a line. If you are a lawyer, it would be twice as great. Thanks.
Name: Anika Collins Email:aademo3@igc.apc.org Response:
A woman can be a careerwoman, wife and mother, however something will suffer. It is almost impossible to do it all with out something "dysfunctioning. "
Don't get me wrong, we do it and do it well, but a lot of times, we put so much into these other things that we leave little time for our emotional selves.
Name: Attica Scott Email:SCOTT@LIBRA.LAW.UTK.EDU Response:
Yes, a woman can be a mother, wife, and a careerwoman without sacrificing the basic structure of the family. You must first have faith in God. He will give you the strength do deal with anything. Secondly, you must have faith that He will give you that strength. Third, don't try to be superwoman and usurp your spouses contributions. Don't play into the stereotype that men cannot take care of children. My husband is the primary caregiver in our house. I work, attend school part-time seeking my masters, and I am involved in various civic organizations. Also, women should not limit themselves. Don't let someone else dictate what you can do. You know your limits and your boundaries. Admit them, but don't let other people set them.
Name: Annearie Etienne Email:ANEKIB1@erols.com Response:
A woman who can bring her education, her many experiences, and her dedication to raising a family, is a superb example and teacher to her children.
